Date - 01/05/2017
Place - Hotel Richmond Residency, Bengaluru


I am here in Bangalore for a conference named COMSNETS, where I am also presenting a paper jointly authored by myself and my guide Prof. Debashis Saha. I have spent many a days in this city before. Four years to be precise. I turned 30 in October last year. So, where did the last 6 years go? What happened? Who am I today? I had an uneasy feeling inside me since quite some time now. But today as I sunk into the plush bed cushions of my bed in the hotel room, I could hear the noises more clearly. While the feeling is indescribable, there is something which is pushing me to write about it.

Let me review the last six years to begin with. My time here in Bangalore can be described by two or three main undertakings that I was mostly involved with. Like many in my age, I was quite confused about life in general, and my occupation in particular. I barely exercise much agency of my own, in choosing my initial career at Satyam, followed by IBM and Tech Mahindra. In fact, when I look back today, there has hardly been occasions where  my choices were consciously taken. While I think that no choice ever made is truly one's own, and has some level of structural influence, there are choices people make out of an intuitive gut feel, choices where the heart overpowers logic. This minute event in the life of a person, when he takes a step, not in the uncontrollable throes of a passion, but a sweet desire reeking of freedom and hope and mystery, is what constitute the subjectivity of a person's life. So coming back, my subjectivity was highlighted on occasions which I can count on my fingers. First, I decided to enroll for the Karate sessions and reached till a Brown junior level before moving to Kolkata, secondly, I enrolled in a few Violin classes and learnt a bit of it, and thirdly I almost became a Buddhist monk.

And then i got married! Well, i wanted to actually, but also didn't want to on some levels. That topic for some other day though!

I learnt and unlearned quite a few things in these past years, My quest has undergone and continues to undergo see many crests and troughs. Six years ago, I was a pensive, heartbroken, lonely, and clueless man. Clueless about almost everything. Love, relationships, expectations, ambitions, hate, jealousy, lust, you name it. By clueless, i mean i was not fully conscious of any of these aspects, and hence I failed at managing them on every occasion. Clueless therefore, does not mean not experiencing these aspects. I have certainly grown way more aware of each of them, compared to six years before. My perceptions is getting better, and I try to be empathetic to people and understand their point of view, even in times when either anger, or ill-will arises in my mind for any of their action. Sometimes i have been able to manage these emotions and look above them, and practiced kindness, yet other times i have given in to these emotions, for the worse. Anyways, at least i know that i am becoming conscious by each day. This development for me about myself, is the most re-assuring development i will have to say.

However, there i challenges. I still have trouble listening to people, and connect with them. Very few things seem to grab my interest, in spite of the attention i give to them. This also brings me to another important aspect i am struggling with. I am not flowing. I feel my actions are constricted. While my head is almost always active, with constant monologues of could be's and would be's and what was and what will. The manifestation in my overall conduct however, appear loathsome and dry and tiring. Therefore i am thinking, whether the way i am practicing (at least some of it) suits me. I think not. Therefore, i am beginning to find my way all over again. Probably a path, where i can practice more compassion, more kindness, develop my perception and thinking, and continue on the path of meditation. But also, something that feels more natural, more in tune, more comfortable and joyful. Maybe small things here and there! But, i must do it.

To begin with, i am going to try to inculcate the qualities of Bushido. These are:

I. Rectitude or Justice

Bushido refers not only to martial rectitude, but to personal rectitude: Rectitude or Justice, is the strongest virtue of Bushido. A well-known samurai defines it this way: ‘Rectitude is one’s power to decide upon a course of conduct in accordance with reason, without wavering; to die when to die is right, to strike when to strike is right.’ Another speaks of it in the following terms: ‘Rectitude is the bone that gives firmness and stature. Without bones the head cannot rest on top of the spine, nor hands move nor feet stand. So without Rectitude neither talent nor learning can make the human frame into a samurai.’

II. Courage

Bushido distinguishes between bravery and courage: Courage is worthy of being counted among virtues only if it’s exercised in the cause of Righteousness and Rectitude. In his Analects, Confucius says: ‘Perceiving what is right and doing it not reveals a lack of Courage.’ In short, ‘Courage is doing what is right.’

III. Benevolence or Mercy

A man invested with the power to command and the power to kill was expected to demonstrate equally extraordinary powers of benevolence and mercy: Love, magnanimity, affection for others, sympathy and pity, are traits of Benevolence, the highest attribute of the human soul. Both Confucius and Mencius often said the highest requirement of a ruler of men is Benevolence.

IV. Politeness

Discerning the difference between obsequiousness and politeness can be difficult for casual visitors to Japan, but for a true man, courtesy is rooted in benevolence: Courtesy and good manners have been noticed by every foreign tourist as distinctive Japanese traits. But Politeness should be the expression of a benevolent regard for the feelings of others; it’s a poor virtue if it’s motivated only by a fear of offending good taste. In its highest form Politeness approaches love.

V. Honesty and Sincerity

True samurai, according to author Nitobe, disdained money, believing that “men must grudge money, for riches hinder wisdom.” Thus children of high-ranking samurai were raised to believe that talking about money showed poor taste, and that ignorance of the value of different coins showed good breeding: Bushido encouraged thrift, not for economical reasons so much as for the exercise of abstinence. Luxury was thought the greatest menace to manhood, and severe simplicity was required of the warrior class … the counting machine and abacus were abhorred.

VI. Honor

Though Bushido deals with the profession of soldiering, it is equally concerned with non-martial behavior: The sense of Honor, a vivid consciousness of personal dignity and worth, characterized the samurai. He was born and bred to value the duties and privileges of his profession. Fear of disgrace hung like a sword over the head of every samurai … To take offense at slight provocation was ridiculed as ‘short-tempered.’ As the popular adage put it: ‘True patience means bearing the unbearable.’

VII. Loyalty

Economic reality has dealt a blow to organizational loyalty around the world. Nonetheless, true men remain loyal to those to whom they are indebted: Loyalty to a superior was the most distinctive virtue of the feudal era. Personal fidelity exists among all sorts of men: a gang of pickpockets swears allegiance to its leader. But only in the code of chivalrous Honor does Loyalty assume paramount importance.

VIII. Character and Self-Control

Bushido teaches that men should behave according to an absolute moral standard, one that transcends logic. What’s right is right, and what’s wrong is wrong. The difference between good and bad and between right and wrong are givens, not arguments subject to discussion or justification, and a man should know the difference. Finally, it is a man’s obligation to teach his children moral standards through the model of his own behavior: The first objective of samurai education was to build up Character. The subtler faculties of prudence, intelligence, and dialectics were less important. Intellectual superiority was esteemed, but a samurai was essentially a man of action. No historian would argue that Hideyoshi personified the Eight Virtues of Bushido throughout his life. Like many great men, deep faults paralleled his towering gifts. Yet by choosing compassion over confrontation, and benevolence over belligerence, he demonstrated ageless qualities of manliness. Today his lessons could not be more timely

I wish to have more steadfastness and faith in myself.

Probably I would have much to say when i write here again the next time.

Never lost,
yet i find again
Touches me by,
dewdrops remain
Some angry sky,
and earth serene
That takes me far,
and loves again

Stars are all i think of now
of their journey
and darkness of their path
and their bright long cover

why do they have to be so far
to make them look small
someone must be scared
of love and beauty

someone must be singing
only to listen to himself
and call them down
to kiss them and ask for love

From an unknown poet

ना सुकून ऐ दिल की है आरज़ू,

न किसी अज़ल की तलाश है। 

तेरी जुस्तजू में जो खो गयी,

मुझे उस नजर की तलाश है।

जिसे तू कहीं भी न पा सका,

मुझे अपने दिल में वो मिल गया .

तुझे जाहिब इसका मलाल क्या,

ये नज़र नज़र की तलाश है।  

तुझे दो जहाँ की ख़ुशी मिली 

मुझे दो जहाँ का आलम मिला 

वो तेरी नज़र की तलाश थी 

ये मेरी नज़र की तलाश है 

मेरी राहतों को मिटा के भी 

तेरे गम ने दी मुझे ज़िन्दगी 

तेरा गम नहीं यूँ ही मिल गया 

मेरी उम्र भर की तलाश है  

रहे नूर मेरी ये आरजू 

न रहे ये गर्दिश ऐ जुस्तजू 

जो फरेब ऐ जलवा न खा सके 

मुझे उस नजर की तलाश है 

Something i scribbled in office for Teacher's day:
....
....

Not by power of falsely might..
or by thrones, or swords of blood..
but by love and wisdom's insight..
breaking the dams on knowledge's flood..

I will carry you in ways unknown..
your love and stregnth in my humble pitcher..
to leave behind, long after

we're gone..
some of me and some of you, dear Teacher !

Woh ret ka samandar tha kinare

jahan hum tum baithey they

kehne ko kuch na tha magar

baatein fir bhi hoti rahin der tak

jab bhi tum najar hatake door lehron ko dekhti

main chupke se tumhari aankhon me jhaank leta

kya kahin inme kabhi mera khayal tha

par ye to tum jano aur tumhari aankhen

aaj bhi jab kabhi tanhayee me baithta hun

door door tak us ret ka ehsaas hota hai

lagta hai inme tumhari muskurahat aaj bhi bikhri hai

bas samet nahi sakta unhe 

waqt ke jhole me jab kabhi haath daalta hun

har baar haath se kuch choot jaata hai,

aur wo sagar kabhi kabhi ret ke sath nikal padta hai

kahin se maano tumhe leke aaya ho

=======================================

वो रेत का समंदर था वहां, 

जिसके किनारे हम तुम बैठे थे 

केहने को कुछ नहीं था मगर 

बातें फिर भी होती रहीं देर तक 

जब भी तुम नजर हटाके दूर लहरों को देखती 

मैं चुपके से तुम्हारी आँखों में झाँक लेता 

क्या कहीं इनमे मेरा कभी मेरा ख्याल था 

पर ये तो तुम जानो और तुम्हारी आँखें 

आज भी जब कभी तन्हाई में बैठता हूँ 

दूर दूर तक उस रेत का एहसास होता है 

लगता है इनमे तुम्हारी मुस्कराहट आज भी बिखरी है 

बस समेट नहीं सकता उन्हें 

वक़्त के झोले में जब कभी हाथ डालता हूँ 

हर बार हाथ से कुछ छूट जाता है 

और वो सागर कभी कभी रेत के साथ निकल पड़ता है 

कहीं से मानो तुम्हे लेके आया हो !

The Virtual Activity

YouTube is a gift. A good amount of my time has been spent on YouTube and Wikipedia in recent months. These two sites have added a lot to my knowledge of world affairs and have exposed me to some of the thoughts and ideas of the very best intellectuals of our time and they have helped me form opinions on some of the key issues that matters. Its important that i document my current views and try to crystallize them as clearly as possible.

Persons whose ideas have been introduced to me virtually in recent times:

1. Noam Chomsky : He has been unarguably the biggest influence on me recently. For the parts of his arguments, which i can relate to and understand, i have no difficulty endorsing. His views on States being able to manipulate and control peoples needs and way of life and keep them passive and selectively informed through various means in "Manufacturing Consent" is worth knowing about. He makes a strong argument and with his encyclopaedic knowledge and insight helps in understanding the power struggles of those who possess the information in society. His views on Governments being violent organizations and one whose acts should always be watched closely and skeptically, makes complete sense. One particular video which i like of him is this where he explains what exactly is the purpose of education.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdNAUJWJN08&context=C3d0bfacADOEgsToPDskJTDVoSH3tYJMAZRil1kZCJ

2. Christopher Hitchens :  I like him more for his mannerisms and the thrill he brings while he is debating  rather than his views. Some of the points related to the disastrous consequences of religious ideas and dogmas that he discusses so often completely makes sense. I admire him for some of the things he stands and fights for vehemently like "free speech", "right to a free inquiry" , "emphasis on scientific approach",  "opposition to dogmas and hypocritical stances of organized religion" and yes his "fearlessness". With his passing away in December 2011, he will be missed dearly by the intellectual world. RIP.

Documentaries I have watched in recent times:

1. Cross vs Crescent (The story of Crusades)

2. Conrad Wolfram on making maths beautiful

3.Philosophy - A Guide to Happiness

4. The fall of Lehman Brothers

5. The perfect Vagina

6. Albert Einstein (BBC Documentary)

7. The Rushdie Affair

8. Manufacturing Consent

Contd....

Reflections on 2011

I do not know how to assess the year gone by. By that i mean i do not know what i am supposed to look for while going through the events. But, i feel like summing up the year that got added to my life's timeline.

2011 had events that took me on an emotional roller coaster ride. I started the year with lofty notions and dreamy ideals of entering the world of service. Completed the long application of Indicorps, sailed till the final interviews with all the naive and half baked philosophies of mine. Rambled on in the interviews without making much of sense. Impassioned however my arguments were, i fell short of logic. As expected, i didn't make through the final list. But the experience just held a mirror to myself. Nothing was adequate in my preparation. Neither had i done a proper research on the prevailing scenarios, nor i had answers as to how i can help in bringing any sort of sustainable change. All i went with was a compassionate and heal all sort of attitude. But I have come to believe that all experiences, that are borne out of a conscious choice that you make, whether well planned or not, somehow are pointers that lead you to the kind of life you work to have for yourself. The Indicorps experience was one such for me.

Learning from the experience:

# Never ever take crucial decisions when you are undergoing an emotional turmoil. The work has to be done to fix everything that is wrong inside in such a case. Whether you are undergoing relationship issues (which in my opinion are the reasons for the major chunk of problems), or you are under heavy influence of ideologies and feel compulsions to act because of it. The second case however can work wonders sometimes in some cases.

# I have come to believe through experience that there are only two ways of decision making which can bring about concrete results:

The first one is being rational and taking a step after having known the associated possibilities and the risks involved. One has to be extremely aware of situations and ground realities while taking decisions in a rational manner.

The second way is to completely follow one's heart. This particular method although ambiguous in the sense that you cannot exactly predict the course that your actions will put you into, is the reservoir of all the miraculous events that a man can bring about. This is the way of your true being, this is the key to unlock one's unlimited energy reserves and this is the key to live outside the clutches of fear. Every unusual life story that we come to hear is a result of this approach of life. All the other ingredients (self discipline, courage, conviction, confidence) are although necessary, they more or less come along with the first step.

# Everything is subject to change. The most influencing ones being our thought pattern. This is natural considering that most of our held notions are combined results of impressions/experiences/perceived information (wrong or right) combined with the complex psyches that each one of us has. There is no correct way to do a thing. If you truly want to participate, you've got to take sides (based on what you think is right). There is no such way that you can call righteous. Of course there are certain universal principles which are considered to be good and ought to be followed.

Anyways, the point here being that change is natural and should be welcomed, because it can be scary and emotionally difficult to cope with for an unprepared mind.

While the Indicoprs selection process is over, my leanings and obsession with "working to bring social equity and right change" is not. However towards the end of the year i realize that i became less aware socially and followed the news rather superficially without any in-depth studies. This brings me to my next phase of  dilemmas i had to go through in 2011.

While my relationship (rather my effort to have a relationship) had met its closure, back when i left my last employer. Feelings i had, were far from over. My naivety although fractured, was still there with its dilapidated structure. The final blow came with the news of her marriage. Although it was very much an expected thing to happen, hearing it was a crushing blow. I felt like having lost her all over again. Love is very unusual in the way it morphs peoples' lives. I will perhaps never be what i was, before i met her, but i don't regret that. I do not anymore have any naive notion that she perhaps liked me in the same way.

Moreover, I was too complex (which i think i still am) in the way i handled everything. One day i am tying 'raksha-sutra' at 'Dakshineshwar Kolkata' for her with moist eyes, and yet i am reluctant to let her know about anything i went through. Some regrets are there and always will be but i have sailed through the turbulence for the most part. This was my first love and i know it will be the most dear experience till i breathe last. I will not be able to answer and understand the whys and hows of this part of my life but I know time holds the answers and i have learned to trust it completely. 

2011, introduced me to the world of Martial Arts. I suddenly decided and enrolled myself for 'Kyokushin' classes. This i think has been one of the most remarkable events that has happened to me in 2011. When i joined, i was not sure i would be able to carry it through, and yet i am running the 5th month, and also have been promoted to an Orange Belt. Wearing the Kimono and swaying myself with the powerful body movements was always a dream i had and i have embarked on fulfilling it.

My sense of poetry and knowledge about different poets and their work is richer. I have written few poems, and they are what i consider "work borne out of moments of pain and longing". I think that is how poets are born mostly. Loneliness, pain, euphoria, longing for the unknown they are the ingredients of a poet. Nevertheless, i write when i feel like writing, and that is how all my poems are written till now. 

Also, Violin understands me much better, and i can really progress fast if i practice more honestly and sincerely. I hope 2012 would be more enriching than 2011 in this aspect.

There are also doubts that have crept in my mind all along these events. I am yet to define a concrete role for my living. I am yet to categorize which activities to be labelled hobbies, and which to take up seriously as a career. My involvement in the current job is really poor, and i don't think i will grow properly if i continue the current attitude for my job.  I will have to write up and deliberate more on this. One of the goals for 2012 would be to put myself on a definite track.

I am reminded of my silent voice
hushed away by songs from the gentle night
i see some pearls, perhaps of great price
they wet my burning eyes, and vanish out of sight


beneath the fiery breath of crying ice
melts a river flowing through the beastly heart
flooding, what once seemed a road in disguise
taking me along, dragging me apart


i welcome the dry lands i encounter in my way
with genuine smile and gratitude in my heart
the part of me i long for, there should stay
i sway and kiss it, and return to the silent part.

pyar wo beej hai

प्यार कभी एकतरफा होता है न होगा
कहा  था  मैंने
दो  रूहों  की  एक  मिलन  की  जुड़वां  पैदाइश  है  यह
प्यार  अकेला  जी  नहीं  सकता
जीता  है  तो  दो  लोगों  में
मरता  है  तो  दो  मरते  हैं

प्यार  एक  बहता  दरिया  है
झील  नहीं  की  जिसको  किनारे  बाँध  के  बैठे  रहते  हैं
सागर  भी  नहीं  की  जिसका  किनारा  होता  नहीं
बस  दरिया  है  और  बहता  है
दरिया  जैसे  चढ़  जाता  है , ढल  जाता  है
चढ़ना  ढालना  प्यार  में  वो  सब  होता  है
पानी  की  आदत  है  ऊपर  से  नीचे  की  जानिब  बहना
नीचे  से  फिर  भागती  सूरत  ऊपर  उठाना 
बादल  बन  आकाश  में  बहना
कांपने  लगता  है  जब  तेज़  हवाएं  छेड़ें
बूँद  बूँद  बरस  जाता  है

प्यार  एक  जिस्म  के  साज़  पे  बहती  बूँद  नहीं  है
न  मंदिर  की  आरती  है  न  पूजा  है
प्यार  नफा  है  न  लालच  है
न  लाभ  न  हानि  कोई
प्यार  ऐलान  है  अहसान  है  न  कोई  जंग  की  जीत  है  यह
न  ही  हुनर  है  न  ही  इनाम  न  रिवाज़  न रीत  है  यह
यह  रहम  नहीं  यह  दान  नहीं
यह  बीज  नहीं  जो  बीज  सके
खुशबू  है  मगर  यह  खुशबू  की  पहचान  नहीं

दर्द  दिलासे  शक  विश्वास  जूनून  और  होश -ओ -हवास  की  एक  अहसास  के  कोख  से
पैदा  हुआ  है
एक  रिश्ता  है  यह
यह  सम्बन्ध  है  -
दो  जानो का  दो  रूहों  का  पहचानों  का
पैदा  होता  है  बढ़ता  है  यह
बूढा  होता  नहीं

मिटटी  में  पले  एक  दर्द  की  ठंडी  धुप  तले
जड़  और  तर  की  फसल
कटती   है
मगर  यह  बंटती  नहीं
मट्टी  और  पानी  और  हवा  कुछ  रौशनी  और  तारीकी  कुछ
जब  बीज  की  आँख  में  झांकते  हैं
तब  पौधा  गर्दन  ऊंची  करके
मूंह  नाक  नज़र  दिखलाता  है
पौधे  के  पत्ते  पत्ते  पर  कुछ  प्रश्न  भी  है  उत्तर  भी

किस  मिटटी  की  कोख  थी  वोह
किस  मौसम  ने  पाला  पोसा
और  सूरज  का  छिडकाव  किया
की  सिमट  गयीं  शाखें  उसकी

कुछ  पत्तों  के  चेहरे  ऊपर  हैं
आकाश  की  जानिब  तकते  हैं
कुछ  लटके  हुए  हैं
ग़मगीन  मगर
शाखों  की  रगों  से  बहते  हुए  पानी  से  जुड़े  हैं
मट्टी  के  तले  एक  बीज  से  आकर  पूछते  हैं -

हम  तुम  तो  नहीं
पर  पूछना  है -
तुम  हमसे  हो  या  हम  तुमसे

प्यार  अगर  वो  बीज  है  तो
एक  प्रश्न  भी  है
एक  उत्तर  भी  !
                           -गुलज़ार

नाम गुम जाएगा , चेहरा ये बदल जाएगा 

मेरी आवाज ही पहचान है, गर याद रहे |

वक़्त के सितम, कम हसीं नहीं 

आज है यहाँ , कल कहीं नहीं 

वक़्त से परे अगर मिल गए कहीं 

मेरी आवाज़ ही पहचान है, गर याद रहे |

नाम गुम जाएगा ...

जो गुजर गयी , कल की बात थी 

उम्र तो नहीं, एक रात थी 

रात का सिरा अगर फिर मिले कहीं 

मेरी आवाज ही पहचान है, गर याद रहे 

ना गुम जाएगा ...

दिन ढले जहाँ रात पास हो 

जिंदगी की लौ, ऊँची कर चले 

याद आए गर कभी, जी उदास हो 

मेरी आवाज ही पहचान है, गर याद रहे 

नाम गुम जाएगा, चेहरा ये बड़ा जाएगा 

मेरी आवाज ही पहचान है, गर याद रहे 

                                                            ......गुलजार 

कभी कभी प्यार की चादर उतार फेंकू ऐसा सोचता हूँ |

सच और झूठ के बीच बैठा,

हर कदम पे चौराहे पाता,

आँखों पे इंतज़ार का पर्दा लटकाए,

विश्वास के घड़े को छलकते देखता |

मन में बैठे उस निश्चल लड़के की हर रोज़ उम्र कम होती है,

उसके इन्द्रधनुषी ख्वाबों में किसीकी स्याही घुल गयी,

उसके खिलखिलाती हंसी में खामोशियाँ घर कर गयीं,

उमंगो की टहनियों को सच्चाई की कड़वाहट काट गयी,

हँसता वो आज भी है, मगर 

हंसी जैसे किसी सोच में खोयी हो उसकी,

सपने वो आज भी देखता है, मगर 

अब रास्तों में वो बात नही|

जाने झूठ को क्यूँ दिल में पनाह देता हूँ,

जाने शब्दों को क्यूँ दिल में दबा लेता हूँ,

प्यार की लहरें इतनी अजीबोगरीब क्यूँ होती हैं ?

समंदर की लहरों को तो फिर भी किनारे नसीब होते हैं,

प्यार की समंदर के किनारे नहीं होते |

 हमने देखी है उन आँखों की मेहेकती खुशबू 

हाथ से छूके इसे रिश्तों का इल्जाम न दो |

सिर्फ एहसास है ये, रूह से महसूस करो 

प्यार को प्यार ही रहनो दो कोई नाम ना दो |

प्यार कोई बोल नहीं, प्यार आवाज़ नहीं 

एक खामोशी है सुनती है कहा कराती है 

ना ये बुझती है ना रुकती है ना ठहरी है कही

नूर की बूंद है सदियों  से बहा  करती है 

सिर्फ एहसास  है ये, रूह से महसूस करो 

प्यार को प्यार ही रहने दो, कोई नाम ना दो 

मुस्कराहट सी खिली रहती है आँखों में कही 

और पलको पे उजाले से छुपे रहते है

होठ कुछ कहते नहीं, कांपते होठो पे मगर  

कितने खामोश से अफसाने रुके रहते है

सिर्फ एहसास है ये, रूह से महसूस करो 

प्यार को प्यार ही रहने दो, कोई नाम ना दो 

हमने  देखी है ...

                                               गुलज़ार 

with tears or smile,

or the moments gone by;

with that heart racing from your sight,

or my colorless empty eyes, 

how do i think of you?

with your moonlit gaze,

or the silence of your eyes;

with those words unsaid,

or the stories denied,

how do i think of you?

with journeys that promised of meet,

or the glimpses, by rain deceived;

with roses so red and lilies so white,

or fading faces and heavy goodbyes,

how do i think of you?

You are beautiful,

but there is beauty all around ;

since the Sun tickles the sleepy flowers,

till the Moon up, lulls for all that is down.

You are full of love inside,

tinkering laughter and song and dance ;

and so is the World that lies,

in sorrows so fake and crafty nuance.

You are the thought that lingers away,

brings life to my life and perks to my feet ;

like the glittering sea of Orange dawn,

and a galloping mare in dreamy street.

 One of the places in my list of places to see !

I Believe 

I believe in the supreme worth of the individual and in his right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

I believe that every right implies a responsibility; every opportunity, an obligation; every possession, a duty.

I believe that the law was made for man and not man for the law; that government is the servant of the people and not their master.

I believe in the dignity of labor, whether with head or hand; that the world owes no man a living but that it owes every man an opportunity to make a living.

I believe that thrift is essential to well ordered living and that economy is a prime requisite of a sound financial structure, whether in government, business or personal affairs.

I believe that truth and justice are fundamental to an enduring social order.

I believe in the sacredness of a promise, that a man's word should be as good as his bond; that character -- not wealth or power or position -- is of supreme worth.

I believe that the rendering of useful service is the common duty of mankind and that only in the purifying fire of sacrifice is the dross of selfishness consumed and the greatness of the human soul set free.

I believe in an all-wise and all-loving God, named by whatever name, and that the individual's highest fulfillment, greatest happiness, and widest usefulness are to be found in living in harmony with His will.

I believe that love is the greatest thing in the world; that it alone can overcome hate; that right can and will triumph over might. 

---inscribed at the commemorative plaque at the  Rockefeller Center, NY

in the hills, once again i stand,

blue from far, and near green;

a portrait, from nature's hand,

colors, everywhere to be seen.

what, but their beauty does mean,

unless by my angel's eyes, seen!

on the golden sea shore i stroll,

gentle waves wrapping my feet;

the blue sky, as if melts and fall,

like the beloveds meet.

 

the golden sand is, but full of gloom,

i pine for your touch, like burning June!

yet, near me always you are,

in busy streets, and lonely palms;

i try to escape, far and far,

only to find me, in your invisible arms.

seems, i behold that eternal creed

always where, we meet.

few bangles, of wooden chips together glued

hands clutched them tight, flowers and thorns alike

eyes of morning prayer, protrude

she touched God, to make him alright

her feet like a cloud, with darkness-filled

 her sunken cheeks, like a dead volcanoes mouth

clutching a thunderous bolt of love it seemed

she put the flowers and left, with God her thought

the silence of this night is dancing

like the first rain kisses the fluttering leaf.

the rhythm of memories embracing

its stillness, wrapping it in the sweet grief. 

sounds of your laughter sings inside

the trapped life in my heart bleeds away.

somewhere far away, i want them to hide

touched by the absence, kissed by your sway.

back to the ways

His future lay in his heart,

bonded by pain and filled up with void

his eyes saw only the dust,

senses dancing away, as if to avoid

many a times he dipped his hands inside,

the darkness could never be swept away

empty hollow cries came up beside,

he kept watching  soul's foul play

sunrise and sunset, seawaves and blue sky,

came and went, along with his life

answers sometimes but, passed him by,

and yet again he continued his strife.